Post by ryan on Nov 8, 2009 0:58:54 GMT -5
A furred eyelid slid open, slow and precise like the blooming of a flower. Kigai’s large arm rested on Jessi Constantine’s smooth figure, as if to protect her from the nightmares that lurked the city’s streets, and now he supposed, the skies.
The memories of the previous night rushed into Kigai’s mind, nearly overwhelming him with information. The angels, the humans, the alpha’s lack of tolerance with strays in his city, and what’s more, his new found commitment to his relationship with the wolfen in his arms. The wolf’s mind was flooded; he needed some air.
Without letting a hair brush the skin of Jessi’s body, Kigai stood from his resting place and exited the dressing room silently. As soon as he was free from the miniature room, the wolf laid his pawed hands upon the floor and stretched out his body, his large maw opening wide with a great yawn, and his tail arching high in the air with the motion. Once his body felt more or less relaxed, he stood from his canine stance and looked out upon the mall’s large passages.
The truth of his nature was taking control. Kigai wanted nothing more than to feel the strength of a pack again, the feeling of trust towards a family of others; in mind at least. But something felt out of place within him, now he yearned for the stars to be above him as his mind rested in the night, not the corkboard of a department store. He yearned for fields of grass brushing his paws as he walked, not the cold hard asphalt of a city. He wanted freedom; he wanted to leave.
But Kigai could not force Jessi out of this place, out of the pack. No, this place was safer. But he couldn’t leave her, could he?
No… I love her. he thought. But a crude, foreign voice slipped into his mind, saying: Do you?
Kigai suppressed a growl towards himself. How could he question such a thing, after the things he had said to her the previous night? How could he let these thoughts enter his head? Was he that confused about himself?!
Kigai shook his head. His mind was confused, what good could come from such an unsure wolf being around her? He knew he needed to sort things out, he just needed a few hours.
The wolf had made a promise the previous night: that he would stay with Jessi throughout the night. Now Kigai was going to break that promise. No doubt she would wake before his return, the least he could do was write her a note. Kigai ran to the next store and found a small piece of parchment, it was torn and stained, but it would have to do. There was a pen with very little ink inside on the counter of the store, and Kigai wrote (more scratched) the words: FORGIVE ME FOR LEAVING, I WILL BE BACK SOON.
Once the hardly decipherable note was finished, he slipped it quietly under the door of the dressing room, and left. Kigai worried that the note would not be legible enough for her to read, but contented himself with the thought that he would be back within a few hours. If she had missed the note, or could not read it, he would give his excuses tonight.
White furred paws padded through the mall, through the pavement of the city, and eventually to the forests that conquered this destroyed world. As the scent of asphalt slowly diluted, the wolf’s pace quickened. Faster and faster Kigai’s paws carried him through the woodland. This was the feeling he craved. He could feel the evil of the city fading in the distance, now it was just him and the wild.
After several hours had passed, Kigai worried for his return, but memories of the dark city and its wretched inhabitants crossed his mind. The werebeast that had tortured that human in the sewers stood out. That one memory alone ruined the moment of serenity he held in the wood, and the wolf quickly pushed it to the abyss of his mind, soon he pushed all of his concerns aside and let himself be in the moment, as nature intended.
The night engulfed the woodlands, and its inhabitants, including Kigai who was now dozens of miles from the city. He had become exhausted from his excursion, and now lay amongst the unearthed roots of a large oak. His concerns for his return rushed back to him. Kigai would have a difficult time asking for Jessi’s forgiveness, for he knew he did not deserve it. But that would come tomorrow, now his mind must settle before he can face his mate again. Though, Kigai underestimated how long his mind will take to settle.
A few hours had quickly turned into a full day, but his absence did not stop there. Very soon, one day turned into several, several days turned into weeks, weeks turned into a month.
The seasons had finally turned cold, and Kigai now noticed the lack of company. For the past month he had been in a swamp of soul-searching. That one crude voice in his mind continued to doubt him, continued to question his motives. But finally, as he laid to rest one cold night, he pushed that voice away and asked himself: What do you really want?
The wolf stared into the night’s starry sky, as if to beg them for the answer. But it was all too simple, and it had been laid before him the moment he stepped into that mall to see what should now be his pack, and his mate.
“Jessi.” He whispered. “She is all I want.”
At that moment, in the heart of the night, the snow colored wolf stood and faced west, back towards the city, and let his paws carry him swiftly once again. Growls ripped through Kigai’s teeth as he cursed himself for leaving his mate. How he could convince Jessi that he truly loved her was beyond him. He had left her in that city, surrounded by company perhaps, but company in a struggling defense against those vultures. If something happened to her…
“I will never forgive myself…” He said, continuing the thought out loud.
Kigai’s paws dug deeper into the soil of the woodlands.
The memories of the previous night rushed into Kigai’s mind, nearly overwhelming him with information. The angels, the humans, the alpha’s lack of tolerance with strays in his city, and what’s more, his new found commitment to his relationship with the wolfen in his arms. The wolf’s mind was flooded; he needed some air.
Without letting a hair brush the skin of Jessi’s body, Kigai stood from his resting place and exited the dressing room silently. As soon as he was free from the miniature room, the wolf laid his pawed hands upon the floor and stretched out his body, his large maw opening wide with a great yawn, and his tail arching high in the air with the motion. Once his body felt more or less relaxed, he stood from his canine stance and looked out upon the mall’s large passages.
The truth of his nature was taking control. Kigai wanted nothing more than to feel the strength of a pack again, the feeling of trust towards a family of others; in mind at least. But something felt out of place within him, now he yearned for the stars to be above him as his mind rested in the night, not the corkboard of a department store. He yearned for fields of grass brushing his paws as he walked, not the cold hard asphalt of a city. He wanted freedom; he wanted to leave.
But Kigai could not force Jessi out of this place, out of the pack. No, this place was safer. But he couldn’t leave her, could he?
No… I love her. he thought. But a crude, foreign voice slipped into his mind, saying: Do you?
Kigai suppressed a growl towards himself. How could he question such a thing, after the things he had said to her the previous night? How could he let these thoughts enter his head? Was he that confused about himself?!
Kigai shook his head. His mind was confused, what good could come from such an unsure wolf being around her? He knew he needed to sort things out, he just needed a few hours.
The wolf had made a promise the previous night: that he would stay with Jessi throughout the night. Now Kigai was going to break that promise. No doubt she would wake before his return, the least he could do was write her a note. Kigai ran to the next store and found a small piece of parchment, it was torn and stained, but it would have to do. There was a pen with very little ink inside on the counter of the store, and Kigai wrote (more scratched) the words: FORGIVE ME FOR LEAVING, I WILL BE BACK SOON.
Once the hardly decipherable note was finished, he slipped it quietly under the door of the dressing room, and left. Kigai worried that the note would not be legible enough for her to read, but contented himself with the thought that he would be back within a few hours. If she had missed the note, or could not read it, he would give his excuses tonight.
White furred paws padded through the mall, through the pavement of the city, and eventually to the forests that conquered this destroyed world. As the scent of asphalt slowly diluted, the wolf’s pace quickened. Faster and faster Kigai’s paws carried him through the woodland. This was the feeling he craved. He could feel the evil of the city fading in the distance, now it was just him and the wild.
After several hours had passed, Kigai worried for his return, but memories of the dark city and its wretched inhabitants crossed his mind. The werebeast that had tortured that human in the sewers stood out. That one memory alone ruined the moment of serenity he held in the wood, and the wolf quickly pushed it to the abyss of his mind, soon he pushed all of his concerns aside and let himself be in the moment, as nature intended.
The night engulfed the woodlands, and its inhabitants, including Kigai who was now dozens of miles from the city. He had become exhausted from his excursion, and now lay amongst the unearthed roots of a large oak. His concerns for his return rushed back to him. Kigai would have a difficult time asking for Jessi’s forgiveness, for he knew he did not deserve it. But that would come tomorrow, now his mind must settle before he can face his mate again. Though, Kigai underestimated how long his mind will take to settle.
A few hours had quickly turned into a full day, but his absence did not stop there. Very soon, one day turned into several, several days turned into weeks, weeks turned into a month.
The seasons had finally turned cold, and Kigai now noticed the lack of company. For the past month he had been in a swamp of soul-searching. That one crude voice in his mind continued to doubt him, continued to question his motives. But finally, as he laid to rest one cold night, he pushed that voice away and asked himself: What do you really want?
The wolf stared into the night’s starry sky, as if to beg them for the answer. But it was all too simple, and it had been laid before him the moment he stepped into that mall to see what should now be his pack, and his mate.
“Jessi.” He whispered. “She is all I want.”
At that moment, in the heart of the night, the snow colored wolf stood and faced west, back towards the city, and let his paws carry him swiftly once again. Growls ripped through Kigai’s teeth as he cursed himself for leaving his mate. How he could convince Jessi that he truly loved her was beyond him. He had left her in that city, surrounded by company perhaps, but company in a struggling defense against those vultures. If something happened to her…
“I will never forgive myself…” He said, continuing the thought out loud.
Kigai’s paws dug deeper into the soil of the woodlands.